February 2009
69 posts
Lines in the e-sand
It seems that Tumblr has now been divided into “negative” and “positive” camps. If you didn’t get the memo, I’m in the negative camp if not for what I say here than for my maintenance of Unfollow Friday.
The truth of the matter is that it’s all bullshit. There are no people on here who could be categorized as simply positive or negative. Reality just...
Guess what I just got
Another crazy email from that bebelstrange dude:
“Self-important scum: take down your latest post about me on your pathetic page. I’ve emailed tumblr support. -bebelestrange”
This guy is a treasure trove of entertainment. He’s still too afraid to give me a return email address, so I’m forced to respond to him here (I totally wouldn’t post his messages publicly...
bebelstrange?
I’ve got to make this quick, but it seems like there are some people who just can’t get it through their skulls that I don’t write the content of UnfollowFriday. It’s user-submitted. I’ve written one or two (see the one about David) but almost all of them are from random people. I don’t even follow or know about the people mentioned, which is why I thought it...
Guts
There’s this one person who keeps trying to get me to post his or her stupid ephemeron and lovepuppy unfollows. UnfollowFriday isn’t a way to vote people off the island here—people don’t want to see the same names with the same crappy insults popping up all the time.
Let me be clear about this: I’m not here to give you a voice, I’m here to give you a venue. You...
Follow this
My followers have traditionally been an unhelpful bunch. I ask a question and I hear crickets. I ask for reblogs on something to get the word out and you all like the post. Hilarious. When I post something that’s not sarcastically offensive or relatable to your childhood or that 30 Rock episode you just watched, I lose about five of you. When I stop posting for a day, you start dropping like...
Comments
On a suggestion, I have just enabled comments on UnfollowFriday. Go defend your honor or add to someone else’s crushing emotional defeat.
Gmail’e ulaşılamıyor..
ΞΕΡΩ ΓΙΑΤΙ ΕΠΕΣΕ ΤΟ GMAIL!!! ΓΙΑ ΝΑ ΞΕΧΑΣΤΕΙ Η ΑΠΟΔΡΑΣΗ ΠΑΛΑΙΟΚΩΣΤΑ!
favoloso constatare l’ondata di twitterpanico per la morte di Gmail :D
Gmail merddddouilllle
gmail 連不上嗎..
enorm veel twiiterazzi gebruiken blijkbaar GMail
GMail sigue en el suelo.
gmail こわれてん？
en de gewone gmail ook weer !
Gmail chet lan :(
ich habe gar kein gmail!
gmail è down...
SPAMANALYSIS
“Hi there! It has been long time since we did not meet.”
You almost had it. Now I’m skeptical.
“I hope everything is okay with you.”
That’s nice of you to say. Go on.
“I found a great medicine shop on the net.”
Whoa, way too soon. I was just getting over the existential riddle in your introduction. It seemed like you were turning things around,...
Awards
As far as entertainment goes, I’d nominate napping or spinning around on my chair over sitting through the Oscars, although I have to admit that seeing all the people on Tumblr trying to strategically analyze it all as if they’re Sun Tzu or something is relatively entertaining.
The Return of Unfollow Friday
I’ve decided to reopen UnfollowFriday. Why, might you ask? I felt like it. For those of you unaccustomed to the premise, you send in an explanation of why you’re unfollowing someone and fun is had by all.
So start sending in those submissions!
Reblog to get the word out.
P.S. Marco, before you pull out that “introducing more negativity” quote again, remember that you...
Something About Something About
It pains me to read There’s Something About Mary, seeing as the writer is relatively intelligent but too far down the rabbit hole to make it convincing. It’s such a strange world to witness on even my uninterested and limited level, and the writer is clearly too invested. Between trying to give earnest constructive criticism and personally sparring with Julia, it seems like she should...
Credit where credit's due
I’m an outspoken critic of a lot of things. While I may sometimes go over the top with my criticism, I definitely don’t hand it out to just anybody.
Initially, I knew nothing about Gary other than that he was being plugged by the Tumblr honchos. That wasn’t in itself worthy of criticism, but it wasn’t a great association to start out with.
I brought up the issue of using...
Skill
I’m slowly getting better at telling the difference between lint and KitKat crumbs before I eat them.
For Christ's Sake
Guess what the “St Andrews Solidarity with Palestine Campaign” has just done.
If you guessed that they tried to replicate the amazingly stupid NYU protest by “occupying” Lower College Hall, you’d be sadly correct.
Now this is probably the most students who have ever opted to go to Lower College Hall, where I think there may or may not be anything more than a couple...
And they thought association with Hamas, Hitler, the PLO, the PIJ, the Al-Aqsa Martyrs Brigade, and Black September was bad press…
“what do i want? TOFU CREAM CHEESE! when do i want it? NOW!”
– NYU protest organizer on Twitter. I couldn’t make this shit up.
When I'm bored I read the reviews on...
Here are some recent ones:
i think that this game makes fun of nreds.i dont think you shudd be aloud to use the term nerd, they are people who are smater then most other people and if they want to anwer a qustion let them!
i kind of dont like it aswell cuz i broke my mouse
stinky. too easy. gets boaring real fast.
i think this game is stuid and does it ever end??
Ok wow no um no its tearrable...
A quick lesson on tumblr for Gary V.
soupsoup:
I welcome you here to tumblr, Gary. I love having you here. I hope you consider my advice.
As much as we might not see or like it, there is a silent majority on Tumblr that follows Julia and a couple people who post motivational phrases. These are the people Tumblr is really targeting. For all our self-importance, we (those in touch with the community) would never provide a...
MY, WHAT A SPECTACULAR DISPLAY OF DESPERATION
I can just imagine David planning out the monetization of Tumblr during development:
“If we can just land the Wine Library TV agreement we’ll be set!”
In the interest of accuracy, the following is the actual monetization strategy David originally wrote before launching Tumblr:
“Get a bigger trust fund.”
Hire TopherChris as the Tumblr Community Placater
Progress
We just need Tumblr to do more stupid dystopian shit so they will release more features in a panicked frenzy to divert our attention.
Embarrassment
I forgot to bring my wallet with me into town. That shouldn’t have been so bad because I only wanted to buy a £3 case of crappy beer and I had that much in change.
Not having a wallet also meant I had no ID. This shouldn’t have been a problem seeing as the drinking age over here is 18, and I look like I’m in my mid 20s. I have a mustache and a bit of a beard, as well.
...
Blair just informed me
that I was mentioned in that New York Times piece that I didn’t read.
Guide to being taken seriously:
Never use the word haters.
I think there’s a disconnect between my perceptions and those shared by Jaimeleigh, David, and a few others about the role of anonymity. I grew up on the internet, and anonymity is very natural for me. It’s part of being careful and prudent in most situations. I don’t think any of you get anything about knowing the real names of anyone here, and I don’t think anyone’s...
uhhh...anonybloggers are not providing a service
markyb:
jaimeleighfairbrother:
They’re cowardly assholes who don’t have the balls to call somebody out and attach the attack to their name, or the name of their blog.
Let’s call a spade a spade.
I wouldn’t say they are cowardly assholes, but I also agree that they don’t provide a service. I don’t think that is why people are upset about the recent censorship. When you think about it, none...
Today is the best day ever!
icanseenewyorkcityfrommyhouse:
Now that the anonybloggers have been driven out of town, get ready for some glamour shots and oblique come-ons to web 2.0 founders. Looking back I wonder, if only I had the courage, what could I have accomplished…
At first I was content just liking this, but it really deserves a reblog.
Movies you know the quality of by the title alone:
City Slickers II: The Legend of Curly’s Gold
Moderation?
Almost every online community has some form of moderation. Up until now, Tumblr’s moderation has been nothing to get upset over. This has drastically changed.
Are they well within their rights to do whatever they want on their website? Sure, but let me be clear about something: Tumblr is what it is because of us, the users, not a few rich guys in NYC. If Tumblr was actually “their...
“They were crunchy and tasted like coffee”
– Becca describing coffee beans
The founder of an Islamic television station in... →
(via idontlikeyou)
Well-played, CNN.
The new face of Tumblr
So I thought I would give my serious opinion about all this recent censorship malarky. Censorship is probably a misnomer seeing as this is silencing. Tumblr actually tried censorship a while ago by denying some users from showing up in Radar, notes, etc. One would think that this would be good enough because it effectively allows people to opt-in to what they want to hear. Such selective attention...
Listen, if they’re shutting down blogs that they don’t like, how have they overlooked the only one that has the ballsies to criticize Marco and David?
We’re living in a dangerous time, so before you click that like button, consider whether you want to be publicly associated with me. All of these names will come out at the congressional hearing.
So Becca was watching this BBC documentary about dreams earlier, and she told me that when scientists removed the parts of brains that basically paralyze us during dreams, we physically act out our dreams in reality.
I was just asleep having a dream where I got into a huge argument with my dad about something ridiculous like corporate bandwidth costs and it turned into an all-out showdown. We...
“I don’t have a problem with bootlegs, but that gets me into a bit of...”
– Paul McCartney
I just found this gem. It’s The Beatles...
Depressing Valentine Reddit Comments Recap:
Can anyone else beat my 27-year streak of being alone, and never giving a present to anyone, ever, on any Valentines Day?
My marriage pretty much ended this week. Looks like I’ll be keeping a motel pillow warm.
Fuck you all. I have no wife, girlfriend, routine whore (or non-routine whore actually), normal friend to commiserate with, or female friend to desire. I don’t even normally...
I wonder if anyone else lyricizes to Bolero when they listen to it.
Bolero bolero-o bobolero
The more you know:
It turns out that when things say cover and microwave, they don’t mean cover with a tissue.
I’m hoping since he deleted the posts, he’s taking this time to calm down and not currently getting on a plane to come stab me in the head.
Remind me not to provoke psychopaths
SECRET INTERNAL MEMO OF FEBRUARY TUMBLR TRENDS:
Strong-willed claims of independence: up 63%
Pictures of babies: up 30%
Reports of self-harm: up 18%
Memes that veil repressed sorrow: up 74%
Pictures of wine: up 52%
Smug offhand references to significant others: up 28%
Desperation: up 58%
Concurrent relationships David is in: up 33%
General self-respect: down 26%